The Cost of Happiness
by TigreGhrin
Summary: When 'toons start getting cancelled and disappearing at an alarming rate and everyone seems to be turning a blind eye, someone has to put a stop to it.
1. A Long Way from Home

_AN: First off, I've never really attempted writing anything like this before and am an inexperienced writer in general, so any tips, advice, and critiques are greatly appreciated._

_Secondly (this is just a minor note), the Warner's do not live in the water tower in this story. They're just acting when they do Animaniacs. And finally, I have included this is the "Who Framed Roger Rabbit" category, as well as the Animaniacs category, because it takes place in Toontown and makes reference to dip. Thank you._

Yakko yawned, arching his back in a cat-like stretch, and sat up in his bed. Another bang sounded from down the hallway. Someone was knocking, practically hammering the door down. Yakko glanced at the clock on his bedside table and groaned: it was barely 3 in the morning. He slowly got up and ambled towards the door.

"I'm comin', I'm comin', hold your damn horses." he mumbled.

Yakko reached the door, still too groggy to be self-conscious of his ruffled fur and less than flattering pajamas. He swung the door open, and a shiver ran up his spine as he was hit with a blast of frigid, night air. As soon as Yakko saw who had been knocking, a second chill rattled his body, jolting him fully awake. His stomach churned sickeningly.

"Police." A gruff looking alligator said matter-of-factly, flashing a badge that glinted dangerously in the moonlight. The 'gator was tall, almost towering, with a clenched jaw and beady eyes that seemed to withhold any emotion. His tiny black hat and comically undersized uniform would have gotten a laugh out of Yakko under more normal circumstances.

"I need you to come with me. Bring your siblings."

"Y-y-yes, sir." Yakko stammered, too caught off guard to come up with anything remotely witty to say.

He heard a loud yawn and turned to see that Dot was already waking up from the noise. She, too, snapped fully to her senses at the sight of the officer.

"Get up!" he hissed urgently.

Dot got up silently, her mind racing. Yakko creeped over to Wakko's bed, scooping up his little brother in his arms. Waking Wakko up before he was ready was a pointless endeavor.

"Alright." the officer motioned outside "Now, in the car."

Yakko went first, carrying Wakko. The kid was heavier than he looked and Yakko's arms were already getting tired, but he was glad to have something to distract from the deafening thump of his heart. Dot followed, and together the trio stepped out into the chill night and then in to the back seat of the waiting police car. Inside, the car was dark and smelled sickeningly metallic, and the three Warners huddled together, shivering. Dot stared at her feet while Yakko squinted to see if he could make anything out in the pitch blackness. The car started with a metallic purr, lurching forward. Wakko stirred, yawning and smacking his lips. He looked around, dazed, and it took a moment before his groggy brain realized he was in a car. He grabbed Yakko's arm, the closest thing to him, in a panic.

"Where...wha's goin' on?"

"You're in a police car." the officer said, his tone had softened and a hint of regret replaced his bitterness. "You're not in any trouble." he added after a pause.

Wakko just shook his head slightly in disbelief and kept his grip on Yakko's arm, as if it were his lifeline. Yakko wanted to say something to console his siblings but, for once, he could think of nothing to say. So, he resigned to keep quiet for the time being. Soon, the car slowed to a crawl as they maneuvered through a parking lot. The car pulled in to a space and stopped abruptly with a grinding of brakes.

"Out." the officer said plainly.

The car spat the siblings onto the pavement with a grunt. They got up, brushing themselves off. The officer squeezed through the passenger door, which was hardly big enough for him. He grimaced, his yellowed teeth glinting like a chesire cat, and with one swift, well practiced movement, he unholstered his pistol. The barrel of the gun was transparent, and a green, bilious liquid bubbled inside. The officer gestured towards the building behind them. The Warner's eyes had nearly adjusted to the dark, and they could just make out the Warner Brothers Studio main building in front of them. Yakko scratched his head, confusion momentarily replacing fear.

"Heya, mister," Yakko blurted out, unable to be silent any longer. "We'd a' called a cab if we wanted someone ta' drive us to work."

"Don't get smart with me." the officer snarled, giving Yakko a shove.

They continued towards the Studio in silence. The only sound that could be heard was the methodic thud of the officer's feet. They soon reached the large, industrial double doors of the main building. The officer plucked a ring of keys from his pocket and fumbled with them for a moment before opening the door with a satisfying clunk.

"Mr. Plotz is waiting for you inside."

The officer stepped aside and the Warner's filed in, squinting under the bright, florescent lights suspended from the ceiling. With another clunk, the door shut behind them. Sure enough, Plotz was sitting, crouched, behind his desk. His eyes were sunken and tired, and his entire face seemed to droop into an ugly grimace.

"Well, sit down, Yakko." he grumbled, unceremoniously. "Just Yakko. This is strictly business. You two can wait next door."

They reluctantly went to the waiting room, Dot dragging her feet and Wakko whimpering slightly. As soon as Yakko heard the door shut, he turned towards Plotz, his face flushed with anger.

"You!" he pointed an accusing finger at his boss. "You had better have a damn good explanation for kidnapping us and dragging us here in the _middle of the night!_ Do you have any idea..."

"That's enough, Yakko." Plotz's calmness was unnerving. "Believe me, I wouldn't be within a mile of you unless it was absolutely necessary."

Plotz reached into his desk and produced a large envelope, his beady eyes fixed on Yakko the entire time.

"This should explain everything."

Yakko snatched the envelope and tore it open, his gloved hands twitchy and agitated. His eyes drifted down the page quickly. Suddenly he froze, wide eyed, and the letter nearly fell out of his hands.

"W-what is this?" he stammered, "Is this some kind of joke?"

"Not at all."

Yakko began to pace, his cheeks burning. This had to be some kind of sick joke. But, the more he looked over the letter the more he was sure of it's authenticity. Animaniacs had been cancelled. He tossed the paper back on Plotz's desk.

"Ok, ok, wait..." he stopped pacing and took a deep breath, "This still doesn't explain why the police were necessary."

"We were afraid you would be rather..._unwilling_ to accept your new employment." Plotz said, putting the letter back in his desk.

"New employment?"

"Animaniacs has been cancelled, but your contract has not. We are transferring you to the Toon Research Facility."

"What?" Yakko did a double take, "You mean at Acme Labs?"

"They've recently affiliated with us, and your contract states that we can transfer you to any affiliate without further notice."

"I can't...this is ridiculous! We're actors, not science experiments!"

"You may leave now. You are no longer employed here." Plotz said with finality.

Yakko felt the cold, scaly hand of the officer grab him firmly by the shoulder and pull him back, placing a cloth over his face. It reeked of chemicals. Yakko struggled, coughing and spluttering, which soon gave way to hollow gasping. All the colors of the room began to swim and meld together, and a warm, buzzing sensation filled his head. Yakko was dimly aware of Dot and Wakko being led out of the waiting room in a similar fashion, but before he could do anything he was completely slumped over, unconscious.

What seemed like an instant later, he was awake again, but his surroundings were dim and unfamiliar. He soon realized he was in the back of a large car. Yakko's head pounded and his mouth felt sour and dry. His eyelids were like lead and he struggled to stay awake, propping himself up. His drugged brain slowly pieced together the events of the night.

Yakko felt around blindly and found Wakko and Dot lying on the floor of the van to either side of him. He pulled them closer. Wakko grabbed on to his arm, only half conscious, and Dot rested her head on his shoulder.

"We're ok." Yakko whispered "We're going to be ok."

He leaned back slightly, once again surrendering to a state of fitful unconsciousness.

After what seemed like another instant, Yakko woke again, this time shivering violently. He was now resting on a cold, metal floor. He sat up slowly, hugging his knees to his chest. The room he was in was small and, despite the dim light, he could easily see to the other side of it. Wakko and Dot were nowhere in sight.

"Hey!" Yakko called out, shakily getting to his feet, "What's goin' on? Is anyone here?"

He walked towards the large, metal door of the cell but was stopped short by a tug on his leg. He looked down to see a large cuff around his ankle attached to a thick chain bolted to the floor.

"Somebody open the door!" Yakko was taken aback by how tired and cracked his voice sounded.

"Yakko?" a faint voice called out.

Yakko stumbled towards the voice and found a small, barred window looking into another cell.

"Dot!" he stuck his gloved hand through the bars and squeezed his sister's hand. "Are you alright? Are you hurt?"

"I want to go home." she whimpered. "Where are we?"

"We'll be back home soon, I promise."

"You really promise?"

"Cross my heart and hope to die." Yakko smiled weakly.


	2. A Rabbit

"Rise and shine, new recruit." a cheerful if slightly nervous voice woke Yakko from his restless sleep.

He got up with a groan, his back aching from the nearly paper thin cot provided in the cell.

"Well, come on." the voice belonged to a rather scruffy looking dog.

The dog wore an old Irish cap and a dull blue vest nearly covered in pockets. Out of one of these pockets he deftly produced a small key and unlocked the cuff around Yakko's leg. Yakko rubbed his ankle, more for sympathy than because it actually hurt, and got up. The cell door stood wide open and Dot, who had already been woken up, waited on the other side, another guard beside her. As soon as Yakko stepped out of the cell, he burst to life, grabbing the dog's hand and shaking it vigorously.

"Ehhhh...it's been nice here and all, but I've gotta' split. See ya'!"

Yakko shot down the hall, grabbing Dot by the hand and dragging her along behind him. The place proved to be a bit of a maze: barren, stone corridors intersected each other at random intervals, twisting and turning off into the distance like the innards of some great beast. They must be underground, Yakko mused, never slowing his pace. The dog, after momentary confusion, had given chase, and now several other guards were joining in. Yakko snickered to himself. Being chased never got old. The corridors still did not end, and Yakko became sure he had gone in a circle. Just then, the mass of guards seemed to disappear. They all turned away and fanned out into the maze. Yakko and Dot paused for a second, confused.

"Hey, I think I see a green light down there." Dot said, squinting down the hallway in front of them.

"I dunno, I'm pretty sure we went that way already."

But Dot had already begun to walk towards the light, so Yakko followed without further hesitation. The hall ended in a large black hole with a welcoming "Exit" sign suspended above it.

"We did it!" Dot practically jumped into the air.

"Something's a little fishy here. There's no way we could have missed that before." Yakko replied, staying a safe distance from the portal.

Once again, Dot was way ahead of him and leapt through the portal before he even finished speaking.

"Come on!" Dot's voice was muddled through the hole.

Yakko sighed with relief and jumped into the blinding sunlight. They were right in the middle of Main Street. No one took much notice of their sudden appearance. After all, toons travelled practically everywhere with portals when they weren't riding the trolley. In fact, the world had taken so little notice of their disappearance and reappearance that the chirping birds and grinning toons were more mocking than reassuring.

"We should hide out somewhere for a while. Maybe we're still being followed." Dot said impatiently.

"Right."

They silently headed for the nearest alley, which was more than sufficiently sheltered from the bright, exposed Main Street.

"Hey! You're that Yakko kid, aren't you? And...Dot, right?"

They spun around to see a tall, brick-colored rabbit leaning against the doorframe of a ramshackle house. He was disheveled and rather plain looking, except for his right eye, which had a large, red question mark where the pupil ought to be, and an excessively large, red bow tie to match.

"Couldn't help noticing you out my window. You don't look too good. You need help or somethin'?"

"Uh, yeah, actually." Yakko responded hesitantly.

"Well, come on in." the rabbit motioned towards the open door.

"Who are you, anyways?" Yakko's brow furrowed slightly.

"Name's Rabbit. I'm a part-time newspaper columnist, part-time unemployed."

Rabbit disappeared into the house and Dot and Yakko followed. The house was small but comfortable, with stacks of yellowing newspapers littering the floor and a typewriter resting on a red, wooden table in one corner. The three stared at each other for a moment, an awkward silence settling over the room.

"Er...so, you needed help?" Rabbit asked, realizing he should probably break the silence.

"Is there any way I could leave Dot here, just for a little while?"

"Well, sure, um, I suppose." Rabbit was a bit taken aback by the blunt request. "You'll be back soon?"

"What?" Dot butted in emphatically. "You're just going to leave me here and run off, after everything that just happened?"

"Look, Wakko's still in there. I have to go back and find him, and I'm sure not taking you back there with me. Could be dangerous." Yakko responded with finality.

"Fine. Just try not to do anything stupid."

"Come on, we're toons. What the worst that can happen?" Yakko turned to address Rabbit. "I'll be back very soon."

Yakko hastily left the alleyway. He was far from comfortable leaving Dot with a total stranger, but he knew that changing his mind would have far more severe consequences. Rabbit nervously adjusted his moth-eaten bow tie.

"What did you two get yourselves into?" Rabbit glanced suspiciously at Dot.

"It's a long story. You probably wouldn't believe it anyways."

"I bet I would." Rabbit persisted, trying to get a newsworthy story out of her.

"Just forget it."

Rabbit sat down behind his typewriter, shrugging. He began to shuffle through the pile of papers by his feet.

"So, er, I suppose now would be a bad time to ask for an autograph?"

Dot sighed and sat down on one of the less precarious looking mounds of paper. Out of all the strangers Yakko could have left her with, it had to be this weirdo.


End file.
